Vice Pro Tan: If Stewart Cink was a golf ball

Vice pays homage to the bald golf tan with a limited edition that’s quirky but totally on-brand for Vice.

I’m not saying Vice designed a golf ball that looks like Stewart Cink’s head after 36 holes in the Georgia sun. I’m not saying that. But if someone did—and if that someone happened to be a German golf ball company with a history of making questionable but fun aesthetic choices—this is about what I’d expect it to look like.

of Vice Pro Tan it’s a limited edition Vice Pro finished in what I can only describe as orange-brown with a white cap. It’s the golfer’s tan, immortalized in urethane. You know the look: burnt from the temples down, lily-white under the hat. It’s not flattering in person and it’s not flattering on a golf ball either. But maybe that’s the point.

Vice’s marketing copy leans into the obsessive golfer angle: “This one’s for obsessives. Those who soak up the sun and stay there for the long haul.” It’s a tee line celebration that no one asked for, but every golfer has. Or at least every bald golfer has.

Credit to Vice here (I think). The company continues to be one of the few in the golf ball space willing to do really weird things. Vice Pro Galaxy was cool and fun. This is… well, it’s weird. Whether it’s fun is also entirely up to you and your tolerance for playing a golf ball that looks like it’s spent too long on a tanning bed with a hat on.

Beneath the sunburn, it is still one Deputy Pro—A three-piece molded urethane ball that has been a solid option in the direct-to-consumer space for years. So at least there is that much.

Prices

Pricing follows Vice’s standard volume discount model: $44.99 for a single dozen, $42.99 per dozen when you buy three, and $38.99 for twelve in sixes. If you need six dozen golf balls that look like a dermatologist’s cautionary tale is between you and your wallet.

I honestly can’t decide if this is brilliant or absurd. It can be both. It’s definitely a conversation starter, and in a sea of ​​white golf balls with slightly different dimple patterns, that counts for something.

of Vice Pro Tan is available now.