As everyone in Italy will tell you, Marc Marquez is a dirty fraud. Even the Pope doesn’t like it very much.
So we at MGPN put on our investigative hats and with the help of an anonymous fan club, we unearthed some inconvenient truths that prove beyond any reasonable doubt that Marc’s win in Aragon was rigged.
Superior tires
Official data shows that in some corners of the Aragon circuit, Marquez had a significant lean angle advantage over his rivals. This can only happen with the best tires of all.
If history teaches us anything, it’s that Michelin knows how to produce a ‘one off’ special tire that suits a particular rider.
Dodgy tires
Speaking of tires, Márquez not only received the tire that gave him the best performance, but Bagnaia felt he had been ‘rewarded’ for ruining his race.
This was no coincidence – Jorge Martin’s dodgy tire at Valencia cost him the title when he fought Pecon. That is not the case at all.
Dorna
Does a Spanish-owned company want a Spanish rider to win in Spain? What are the odds on that? All three? It seems like quite a coincidence to us.
The bottom line is that the owners of MotoGP had a major role in the result of this race for their ‘beloved son’ to finish his journey without a victory.
Plus all the fanfare and fake hype helped to mask the fact that the race was absolutely, horribly dull. Which it was actually.
Dirty grid
In Aragon, it didn’t go unnoticed that one part of the grid was clean and the other dirty. And guess what? Mark qualified on a comfortable pole. The Spaniard did not ask for a pole all season and suddenly here, he got a pole in doubt. why now
The answer is that his side of the grid was clean, but the side Bagnaia was forced to start was dirtier than Trump’s anus. Peco asked Dornan (Spanish owner) if he could clear the starting grid but was told to shave his beard.
This cost Bagnaia victory in both races as he likes to get out in front and use Ducati’s huge speed advantage to fend off any attack – and not join the poor riders.
Cloud seed
For such a dry place, Aragon saw a surprising amount of rain over the weekend. And he made the track ‘green’ all through the rain, meaning skill was required, not motorcycle advantage.
Cloud seeding, a form of weather modification that alters rainfall, was used to give Marquez an unfair advantage by not allowing him to suffer his usual unfair-disadvantages.
Alex Marquez
After a penalty on the grid, it was clear to all that Peco Bagnaia was carving his way through the field and heading for victory just like his mentor. Sadly though, the Italian had to deal with the cheating Marquez DNA – this time impersonating Marc’s failed brother Alex.
He held clean at Bagnaia and halted his inevitable progress to the top of the podium with a brutal World Championship win for the third-placed younger brother.
Bagnaia then says that Alex ‘tried to kill him’, which is the evidence we need. Even Marco Bezeci, who has no beef with the Marquez family and is not affiliated with the VR46 camp, chimed in and said Alex did it on purpose.
We believe Alex and Mark can communicate using one of the cheap helmet bluetooth headsets you can buy from Amazon. This allowed Mark to instantly tell Alex about killing someone.
shoulder
A few years ago, Mark underwent corrective surgery to turn his right arm 30 degrees counterclockwise. But guess what? Aragon is a counter-clockwise track! Basically, the dishonest Spaniard gives his surgical right arm in Aragon 30 degrees more than non-cheating riders.
Essentially, Marquez underwent unnecessary surgery to alter his body and give him an unfair advantage over the rest of the field.
Medicines
Remember, watching Mark’s awesome dance in front of all the paid actors on Marquez’s stand in tears? This is probably because he is taking stimulants.
Dad’s dance may not seem suspicious, but what’s happening is that the dishonest antichrist is using a jig to pull the unused pills out of his leather leg and slide them before they reach the soil. After leaving his friends, they simply collected the pills and threw them into the village paella or something.
Marquez family
As evidenced above, there is speculation that Mark and Alex are blatantly cheating on their father, Julia, possibly to the point of skullduggery. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree… or in this case, if the tree does fall, the rotten apple doesn’t grow much.
We’re not exactly sure what Julia was up to, but it involved disrupting the Lower Chorizo’s venerable VR46 drivers and crew.
